The Final Straw

This is installment two of my story. If you missed the first one, you can find it here .

So, I had been toying with the idea of weight-loss surgery for years… Tossing the idea around in my head and mentioning it casually to family and friends to see what they thought of the idea. 

Most of the time, I was convinced I was just going to be overweight for the rest of my life. I didn’t like the idea, but I figured that I had so much weight to lose that it was an insurmountable obstacle and I should just accept who I was and get on with things.

It wasn’t until the Fall of 2009 that I finally made the decision that it was time to do something.

My daughters had joined a Brownie/Daisy (Girl Scout) troop.  They were enjoying the activities and social events they participated in with the troop.  One of the activities that came up was a hike up the mountain we live nearby.  The girls were so excited.  It was an all-afternoon event, complete with a picnic lunch at the summit.

At first, I was excited, too.

Then, I realized that the girls wanted their dad and me to hike with them. Then, I was mortified.

There was no way I would be able to make the 2-mile hike up the mountain with a bunch of 6-10 year old girls. I couldn’t even go for a walk in my subdivision with it’s gentle rolling hills without feeling like I was going to pass out.  How could I keep up with a bunch of girls on a 2-mile UPHILL hike?

I told myself it was my asthma (not my weight). I told the girls that with the pollen from the ragweed and goldenrod and my asthma and allergies that I couldn’t go with them.  Their daddy agreed to go so we would be sure they were safe and supervised.  The girls were disappointed, but they understood.

The Saturday came and the girls, their daddy, and another friend, headed off to the mountain.  I stayed at home.

It was the longest, most miserable Saturday I can remember.

All I could think about was that my family was off doing something fantastic, having a great time and making memories together and I was at home alone because I was too unhealthy to go with them.

Was this how it was going to be?

When the girls were little, our activities were confined to things that I could handle. Now that they were bigger, their appetites for adventure were growing. They wanted more hikes, camping, bike riding, all sorts of things I wasn’t sure I could handle.

I was pretty miserable and sad thinking this was the beginning of a time when they’d be off doing things without me rather than with me.

But, slowly, over the next few weeks, I started to think about maybe doing something drastic.  Something I had been mulling over for a long time.

Maybe bariatric surgery was the answer for me after all.

I had had two friends at work who had both undergone bariatric surgery earlier in the year.  They were both doing great and the pictures I saw of them months after surgery took my breath away.  They looked so vibrant and healthy – and skinny!

I started emailing them asking all sorts of questions. I started doing research online.

Maybe I could find a way to get healthy and slimmer.  Maybe there was hope after all.

<next, beginning the pre-surgery process>